My Sunshiny Life

{March 16, 2009}   Little Miss Sunshine on the Slopes

I’ve reached the ripe old age of 25 🙂 and haven’t ventured out on the slopes as yet.  Bit silly really considering how good the skiing is in NZ.  I’d probably still be living happily in my anti exercise bubble, but a work trip had been organised so it was time for me to click on the ski’s and give it a go.  Chamonix, look out, Little Miss Sunshine’s comin’ to get ya!

Actually I wasn’t looking forward to it to be honest and was quite vocal in my whinges and moans.  I didn’t expect to be any good at it and was quite prepared to hate it, sitting there drinking hot chocolate all day by a log fire.  1) There wasn’t any need for a log fire  as it was totally hot and 2) I didn’t suck at it…  Here’s a rundown of our first day – there were four of us learners, Ravi, Chet, Sarah and moi.  We had a ski lesson booked with a french instructor whose name we can’t remember.  Lets call him Jean Paul. 

So we started by trying to walk uphill.  I lead the pack.  No one was more surprised than me.  I could almost blow my own trumpet by saying I had a natural ability, but I won’t, because that would be totally uncool.  We tired quickly of frog legging up the little hill to slide down 10 metres, so we graduated frog school and slid over to carpet school.  This involves a tiny little lift that you hop on to and then you slide down a little baby slope.  I loved it but it didn’t take long for us to master this.  I tried to be a bit clever and hop off the carpet slide – totally over estimating my ‘natural ability’ which didn’t include jumping sideways with ski’s on – off a moving slide.  I arsed over and lay there laughing until the ice started burning my skin and I had to move.  We eventually moved on to the disc slope where you put a disc between your legs and lean back slightly as you get pulled up the hill.  I leaned back a little too far and arsed over here as well.  Fact: If you are laughing you cannot get up, it’s impossible.  The disc on the bum slope was slightly scary after the little slope, but we pulled through.  Chet and Sarah were getting it by now and Ravi and I were zooming down the slopes like semi pro’s, turning, stopping and snow ploughing our little hearts out. 

We were filled with confidence and stories of our bravado and heroic mishaps, entertaining all the skiiers who had been up the tough slopes.  Some had a harder time of it than others.  Over estimation of ability and harder slopes than the advertised ‘blue’ meant Little Heena came a cropper… for the whole day.  She went up the top of the slope with the hard ass skiiers and snow boarders of the group. They were going to peel off and go down black slopes while LH ‘found her feet’ back on to skis after a little break.  She started out confident and happy, as she slalomed down the slopes, with the wind in her hair and the beautiful snow capped mountains acting as a picture perfect ski scene backdrop.  Until she crashed.  Until she crashed and burned.  The blue slope mixed with the red and black slopes and LH realised quite quickly that she was well out of her depth.  She unhitched her skis and started the long trek down the slope, with the experienced skiiers in the group giving her moral support as they zoomed up and down the mountain.  She got her ski’s and poles taken down so she just had to get herself down.  She got a little lift with Jane as they toboganned down the hill on Jane’s snowboard, against the advice of Sascha.  Advice that would have be well heeded, as they arsed off and tumbled down the hill at a rapid pace.   As LH made her way down she got moral support by all the skiiers in our group, but conversely the folks on the ski lift took great delight at heckling her and Heena took great delight in trying to throw snowballs at them.  Poor LH took three hours to get down the mountain, at times flipping on to her belly and zooming down the slope like a seal trying to get down faster than the painfully slow progress she was making on her feet. 

Finally the guys talked the skidoo man into rescuing Heena, by this stage she was in view and the skidoo man was fascinated with her downward seal like progress.  With a little flicky show off (but very cool) rev, the skidoo man set off on his rescue mission.  He was fit, Heena was stoked.  This morning she decided to join the beginners – but that’s another story!

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