Brick Lane Festival

I’d been looking forward to seeing Norman Jay at the Brick Lane Festival, but we arrived way too late, with only 20 minutes of his act left.  So instead of rocking with Norman, Dan, Kylie and I just walked around soaking up the atmosphere. 

These guys were fabulous and got the crowd going, a real ‘yay I love London’ moment.

I’m not sure if the ‘stalls’ are there every weekend but there are loads of people that lay all sorts of tat out on blankets.  I really mean it when I say tat too, I know they say one man’s junk is another man’s treasure – but really – who needs a second hand action man, one boot or some forlorn teletubbies!

These guys embodied the feeling of the day.  They were stoked that we wanted their photo, happily busting out a pose.  They almost make me want to wear a hoodie and low slung jeans.

We’d left the food stalls too late and they were packing up, just as my appetite was kicking in.  Only one thing could tide me over until salt and pepper squid at the Drunken Monkey – Lip Lickers, they tasted as good as they smelt.

 Next year we’ll come earlier, so we get to see Norman AND so we get to eat all the fabulous food.

I'm NOT a camping kind of girl

When I told people I was going to The Big Chill they exchanged surprised glances.  Really?  You?  Do you go camping often?  Well no I don’t,  the last time was actually four years ago, funnily enough at The Big Chill.  Four years had put a thick rose coloured filter over my camping experience, so I found the reality a bit of a shock.

Let’s examine the upsides of festival camping.  Ok, that was a short list. 

Now let’s look at the downsides, bugs (lots of them), spiders (there was a momma spider there somewhere with a whole nest of little baby spiders), deflated airbeds, chilly nights (with ridiculously thin sleeping bags), hearing people in the tents around you (that was actually kind of funny sometimes), lack of hot showers (well there were showers but the queues were long, the shower was one open air room where boys could see in – some pervy ones worked out there was a good vantage point from the top of the hill).  I ended up having a shower from the hose pipe in the corner of the camping field.  FREEZING cold, but it was so nice to be clean.

The last downside of camping needs it’s own paragraph.  The toilets.  Words fail me.   I was gagging when walking up the hill one morning, the smell was so stomach turningly putrid.  I have major public toilet issues anyway and that’s for toilets that flush and are cleaned regularly!  I met people and my opening topic would always be about the toilet.  I had major issues all weekend and could not put myself through that again. 

Toilet Dilemma Solution

I tried sneaking into the Podpad bit because they had their own power showers and toilets.  We got busted and escorted out of their enclosure, we were so close too!  I tried bribery, wheedling and then downright begging.  Nothing worked.  Next year I’m going upmarket. 

You may wonder why I’m actually planning on going back.  Well let me explain.  Norman Jay.  Sunshine.  Music.  Fancy Dress.  No Responsibilities.  Junk Food (even for breakfast!).  Funny festival experiences, you just can’t beat them. 

Good friends balance out the toilet trauma somewhat too.

I love the fancy dress, we were partying by the group that had yellow  as their theme

Bananarama

Rockin Banana

Here’s some more yellow fans

We met a Jack Sparrow look  a like, who was a total festival con man and I loved it.  He told us he was planning to fight global corporate evilness to save the rain forests, we just needed to cross his palm with silver (or caress it with a note).  We declined, but I did get him to read my tarot cards and gave him a tenner for the privilege.  He was totally full of crap, but I found his style of delivery most entertaining and it was well worth the money.

Jack Sparrow Con Man

We helped (I watched) let some lanterns off too, so pretty!

So I will be back, but I’ll be back with my own private shower and loo.  A winnebago would fit the bill I think.  It will be a much more pleasurable experience if the topic front of mind is fun, rather than ‘oh my god, I can’t drink anything or I’ll need to visit the toilet of doom’  I would happily pay £5 to do my business in a loo that is clean and flushes.  For a fiver I’d like soap and water to wash my hands and paper towels would be nice too.  In fact, that could be a bloody good business opportunity.  If you’re interested in setting up a new business, I’d pay £50 for the weekend for a sparkly dunny.  Long live the porcelain bowl.